Employment

Careersmas™

University careers services often get a bad press; we can be dismissed as irrelevant, boring or even scary.  The fact is we are usually lovely, friendly people that would ideally be suited working in Santa’s workshops, if it wasn’t such a hard sector to break into (eleves have the market cornered0.  That is because another fact about those of us who work in careers is we absolutely adore Christmas.  We love careers and Christmas so much, that we combine it to make a super holiday, full of love, good cheer and careers advice.  This super holiday is called Careersmas™.

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Careersmas™  is a magical time of year, when the hard working careers professionals dispense advice in the form of Careersmas ™ Carols.  So don your red hat, grab a mince pie and join in with our festive favourites.  All these songs  are dedicated to all of you students and grads out there looking for hope in the Bleak Midwinter of job hunting.

Away in an Assessment Centre

(To be sung to the tune of Away in a Manger)

Away in an assessment centre

I started to cry

When I saw other candidates in a suit and a tie.

My jeans were so scruffy

My teeth were not brushed

My hair was still fluffy

It looked like I’d rushed.

In the group exercise

I started to fret

A group full of people

I never had met

The clock began ticking

And none of us spoke

This whole group activity

Was going up in smoke.

At last came the interview

I slouched on the chair

As they asked me the questions

I played with my hair

I tried to give answers

But didn’t get very far

My answers were rambling

I wish I’d used STAR

As the day ended

I made a deep sigh

Then noticed the dirt mark

Along my right thigh

The shock and the horror

At being unprepared

If I’d contacted Careers Network

I would not have been scared.

Hark! The happy interns sing.

(To be sung to Hark!  The Herald Angels Sing)

Hark! The happy interns sing,

You gain great skills from working.

Insight into future careers

Standing out from your peers.

Joyful all the interns learn

From their job as they earn

When employers praise them high

Their employability goes sky high.

Hark! The happy interns sing,

You gain great skills from  working.

Joy to Careers!

Joy to Careers! The advisor’s come
To help me plan my career
Now I must prepare for it
And gain skills for my CV,
And gain skills for my CV,
And research, and research, and start networking.

Joy to Careers! My internship’s on;
I’m gaining valuable skills.
While working hard, I learn so much
It’ll help me find a job,
It’ll help me find a job,
It’ll help me find a job, that I truly love

Careers Network helps with my confidence
And helps me to reflect

The skills I’ve built at University,
From my course and sports
From my course and sports
From my course and sports and societies

Deck the halls

Deck the halls
of shame with errors
Fa la la la la la la la la
Spelling, grammar and
format terrors
Fa la la la la la la la

Forget the dates at your own peril,
Fa la la la la la la la
Tis the premise of this yuletide carol,
Fa la la la la la la la

See the lack of skills before us,
Fa la la la la la la la
5 pages long is way too much fuss,
Fa la la la la la la la

Specific profiles are good measure,
Fa la la la la la la la
Keep brief your interests and  leisure,
Fa la la la la la la la

Speak not of yourself in third person,
Fa la la la la la la
Include a photo and your chances worsen,
Fa la la la la la la

Ask your dedicated Careers Network team
Fa la la la la la la
To help you achieve your career dream,
Fa la la la la la la

On the first day of Careersmas

On the first day of Careermas, Careers Network gave to me an advisor to check my CV.

On the second day of Careersmas, Careers Network gave to me, , two skills workshops and an advisor to check my CV.

On the third day of Careersmas, Careers Network gave to me three employer presentations, two skills workshops and an advisor to check my CV.

On the fourth day of Careersmas, Careers Network gave to me four mock interviews, three employer presentations, two skills workshops and an advisor to check my CV.

On the fifth day of Careersmas, Careers Network gave to me five mentoring schemes, four mock interviews, three employer presentations, two skills workshops and an advisor to check my CV

On the sixth day of Careersmas, Careers Network gave to me six CV workshops, five mentoring schemes, four mock interviews, three employer presentations, two skills workshops and an advisor to check my CV

On the seventh day of Careersmas, Careers Network gave to me seven blogs from students, six CV workshops, five mentoring schemes, four mock interviews, three employer presentations, two skills workshops and an advisor to check  my CV

On the eigth day of Careersmas, Careers Network gave to me eight internship bursaries, seven blogs from students, six CV workshops, five mentoring schemes, four mock interviews, three employer presentations, two skills workshops and an advisor to check  my CV

On the ninth day of Careersmas, Careers Network gave to me nine work placements,  eight internship bursaries, seven blogs from students, six CV workshops, five mentoring schemes, four mock interviews, three employer presentations, two skills workshops and an advisor to check  my CV

On the tenth day of Careersmas, Careers Network gave to me ten jobs on campus, nine work placements,  eight internship bursaries, seven blogs from students, six CV workshops, five mentoring schemes, four mock interviews, three employer presentations, two skills workshops and an advisor to check  my CV

On the eleventh day of Careersmas, Careers Network gave to me eleven Careers advisors, ten jobs on campus, nine work placements,  eight internship bursaries, seven blogs from students, six CV workshops, five mentoring schemes, four mock interviews, three employer presentations, two skills workshops and an advisor to check  my CV

On the twelfth day Careers Network gave to me… twelve graduate jobs, eleven Careers advisors, ten jobs on campus, nine work placements,  eight internship bursaries, seven blogs from students, six CV workshops, five mentoring schemes, four mock interviews, three employer presentations, two skills workshops and an advisor to check  my CV.

Merry Careersmas to all from Jessica Holloway Swift, Yasmin Ansari and Carl Jukes.

Image Credit: Icould